#601: | Order is maintained in a society not by actual justice but by the perception and illusion of justice. |
#602: | The imposing appearance of court buildings contributes as much to the perception of justice as anything that goes on inside. |
#603: | See my earlier essay: "The Fallacy of Justice" http://bit.ly/BYcA0 (Kilroy Cafe #46) |
#604: | The downside of love is the loss of control over your own destiny. |
#605: | Every object you acquire has its cost: not just the purchase price but the long-term cost of maintenance, storage, protection and disposal. |
#606: | The least interesting musical genre is Country: cloying, conventional sentiments for those who are trapped in the sticks. |
#607: | In Country music, life is superficial: Love is good, breaking up bad, traditions wholesome, broken hearts tragic... BOR-ing! |
#608: | It is usually claimed that Elvis was the greatest musical artist of the 20th Century. Bull! It was the Beatles! No question. |
#609: | The Beatles invented musical irony. Before that, popular songs expressed only bland, conventional emotions. |
#610: | Pity the autistic male whose only knowledge of human culture is related to the following of sports teams. Also pity his wife. |
#611: | My old essay on the tragedy of "Male Sports Addiction" http://bit.ly/d5ks7 (Kilroy Cafe #10, June 08) |
#612: | There are two ways to look at couples who have been married for decades: 1) How sweet! 2) What a tragic loss of potential! |
#613: | The early days of romance are fun - the exploratory phase when anything seems possible. Then new defenses are erected and you see it's not. |
#614: | Never trust a country music singer who tells you how faithful he's going to be. Them good 'ole boys got a poor track record. |
#615: | Nothing mobilizes a community like responding to a tragedy after it has happened, but few will unite to prevent one. |
#616: | "Note to damsels: stay away from men with handlebar moustaches; I am so sick of having to untie you from railroad tracks." @michaelianblack |
#617: | If UFOs exist, you got to give them credit for obeying the Prime Directive. That's the most you can ask of any alien race. |
#618: | When aliens abduct hysterical women from their beds, they always bring them back - sadly. |
#619: | The muumuu is the refuge of overweight women. |
#620: | Millions of U.S. households aren't ready for the switch to digital television. It's a HUMANITARIAN CRISIS! |
#621: | Whenever I clip my fingernails I think of the San Andreas Fault, which is moving at about the same rate, building tension. Gonna snap soon! |
#622: | The poverty of American culture is that its social policy relies almost entirely on punishment, not prevention. |
#623: | Another dead child found in a dumpster. Oh, the wailing, the memorials, the calls for justice. But was anything done for her when alive? |
#624: | The thing that keeps most lawyers from truly understanding the law is their unquestioning faith in it. |
#625: | Orangutans are skeptical of changes in their cages. Also homeowners. |
#626: | The hallmark of intelligence is curiosity. |
#627: | Curiosity is detecting what doesn't fit with your current knowledge and exploring it until it is understood. |
#628: | Homeowners have a greater stake in their community than renters. Society needs more people who are totally trapped. |
#629: | Statistically, married people and pet owners live longer. Also: people in prison live longer, due to lowered risks. Analysis? |
#630: | If a million dollars would make you happy, would 2 million make you twice as happy? No! There is no personal benefit in excess. |
#631: | Just because a nutrient is essential for your health doesn't mean taking massive quantities of it will do anything for you. |
#632: | "Packratting" is the human tendency to stockpile resources even when they are not realistically needed. With mental illness, it gets worse. |
#633: | People are attached to their possessions like a spider to its web. "Don't touch that!" they say if you try to change anything. |
#634: | "Family" - a shared delusional system by which dysfunctions are handed down from one generation to the next. |
#635: | Call me naïve, but where does McDonalds™ get all the square fish for its Fillet-o-Fish™ sandwiches? |
#636: | Living well and happily has little to do with what you own. It has everything to do with how well you spend your time. |
#637: | "KilroyCafe is a twitter maniac!" @Skylorde - My reply: I yam what I yam. |
#638: | You don't realize how boring sex can be until you've seen "Real Sex" on HBO. |
#639: | A radically subversive counter-cultural idea: Sex is meaningless! See my essay "Sex Fraud" http://bit.ly/vq1xO (Kilroy Cafe #3) |
#640: | People become so invested in sex that they'll come up with no end of absurd ways to make it seem interesting. |
#641: | How many fetishes can there be? All become tiresome after a while. They don't change the waning appeal of the underlying product. |
#642: | Sex is like chocolate cake. It's enticing from afar and when you take your first bite, but taste fades when surrounded by it. |
#643: | With sex, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence - with another partner or beyond some forbidden barrier. |
#644: | People would rather improve their lives through product acquisition than make real effective changes. |
#645: | "BlackBerry™ anxiety" - The pathological fear of not knowing where your BlackBerry™ is when it isn't directly in your hand. |
#646: | If you look too closely at show biz you'll see it's all fake. Real life, with all its warts, is far more entertaining. |
#647: | Early sailors visiting Florida saw the manatee and thought they were seeing the mythical Mermaid. "Boy, is this lady ugly!" |
#648: | Convertibles are ridiculous. Do you really want the wind in your face and the sun beating down on your head? |
#649: | "Organic" is something that grows from within, at its own pace according to its own rules, vs. forced from the outside. |
#650: | Naïveté can be defined as anything prior to ones current state of development. |
#651: | Why are sweat glands unique to humans? They seem like such a handy cooling mechanism. |
#652: | Thank God for the breeders, people willing to put their lives on hold for 20 years to propagate our species. Without them where would we be? |
#653: | I looked around me and said, Is THIS what I want to be doing for the rest of my life? |
#654: | If you like mountains, cool breezes, crisp air, babbling brooks and charming local culture... Florida ain't the place. |
#655: | In most marriages, one is the "parent" and the other the "child". These roles are self-reinforcing and exaggerate over time. |
#656: | In a relationship, one party doesn't become more helpless and dependent without the other in some way enabling it. |
#657: | Divorce is an accumulation of unpaid bills all come due at the same time. |
#658: | My spy photos from the Adam & Eve™ Romance Superstore, St. Augustine, Florida (taken an hour ago) http://bit.ly/AwbNN - So this is romance? |
#659: | Can you say "Georgia"? Round heeyah it's "JAW-jah". |
#660: | You can't really tell the truth until you learn to lie. |
#661: | With music, all that matters is the quality of the sound that comes out of the speakers. Everything else is musical bullshit. |
#662: | A great song is great after only a single recorded performance. Once it's been nailed, there's no creative purpose in performing it again. |
#663: | There is only one reason an artist would perform the same song over and over: money. Otherwise, they should be creating new songs. |
#664: | Most people who perform music are incapable of writing it. |
#665: | The main creative problem in music is the same as any other medium: having something to say. |
#666: | Zahavi's "Handicap Principle" says that animals (and humans) will ostentatiously waste resources to signal their fitness. It's everywhere! |
#667: | The best example of the Handicap Principle is the plumage of the peacock, which is costly and useless but somehow impresses the female. |
#668: | The female figures, "Wow, if this guy can waste so much on his fancy car, he must really be rich and powerful." |
#669: | The Handicap Principle helps explain human breasts, which are far larger than they have to be to give milk. They are a fitness signal. |
#670: | The Handicap Principle suggests an inate human tendency to ostentatiously display and waste ones resources. It signals you are powerful. |
#671: | Luxury cars and palacial homes are of no practical benefit to the owner. They're only a signal to others: "I can afford to waste resources." |
#672: | Evolution teaches us, "If you got it flaunt it!" A costly theatrical show of power may avoid an actual fight, which is even costlier. |
#673: | Unless it's your job, you should never install or "fix" anything on someone else's computer, even if they ask you to. It's a boundary issue. |
#674: | That's not the national deficit. That's the money you could be saving by switching to Geico. The deficit is over THERE. |
#675: | My new philosophy essay: "The Handicap Principle" http://bit.ly/uW4oj (Kilroy #49) - Ostentatiously wasting resources may be in our genes. |
#676: | If you want to take the joy out of travel, buy an RV. Now you're hauling a huge unnecessary infrastructure and can't travel light anymore. |
#677: | It's absurd to call RV parks "campgrounds". Nobody camps there any more than they camp in hotel rooms. They only "plug in". |
#678: | People think they need RVs only because they can't bear to leave behind all their unnecessary stuff. |
#679: | Dear Northerners: Please enjoy your Dagobah summer before the closing in of the Hoth winter. |
#680: | Most of the things adults call their "toys" - motorcycles, etc - are used as often as kids use theirs: once or twice then stored forever. |
#681: | Did I hear you dissing Walmartania again? This is my country! We didn't fight those wars with K-Mart and Sears for nothing! |
#682: | I have so many people to thank for this great honor: my mom, my dad, my lovely wife and above all my Wal-Mart for its Low Prices... Always! |
#683: | Let us never forget those millions of men and women who gave their lives, at starvation wages, to defend our Always Low Prices. |
#684: | When not just any caffeine delivery system will do, you need Pepsi Max "The first diet cola for men." Alas, it's totally gay! |
#685: | There's only one reason a mega music star goes on tour: for the money. If they truly loved music they'd be making it, not repeating it. |
#686: | For the price of an RV, you can buy a lot of motel rooms and a lot of airline travel to places an RV can't reach. |
#687: | A Thing You Don't Need: Recreational Vehicles (RVs) http://bit.ly/9b5D1 (April 09) |
#688: | The art of music is polluted by its performance. |
#689: | "Had an epiphany last week and canceled the cable TV - *they* should be paying *me* a monthly fee to watch that sh*t!" MRT @netdudette |
#690: | Do you know where your data is? "Data Center Overload" in the NY Times (6/14) http://bit.ly/gTb7t - It's in the cloud. |
#691: | My speeding rules: No more than 9 mph above limit, except when traffic is faster, but don't be the fastest. In small towns, 4 mph faster. |
#692: | The needless risk-taking of youth is usually replaced by pathological risk aversion in the old. |
#693: | Most of the things you see as essential are imaginary barriers you have created for yourself to make change seem impossible. |
#694: | It is amazing what we can comfortably do without when forced to, but we are loathe to make such decisions on our own. |
#695: | Your body has amazing heating and cooling capabilities, but if you live in climate-controlled comfort these systems will never activate. |
#696: | "Old" is an accumulation of restrictions about certain ways things must be done. It has little to do with age. |
#697: | As a former airline baggage handler I can report that you're damn lucky to get your bags at all! |
#698: | It is a form of child abuse to raise a child in conditions of wealth and privilege he can never reasonably attain himself. |
#699: | No one cries for the "poor little rich kids" but their adjustment to real life can be difficult and traumatic. |
#700: | Rich kids can feel trapped: The only way to retain the privileges they are used to is to take up Daddy's business. |