| #1001: | Childbirth: one of the world's most narcissistic acts. Raising a child who's already here: one of the least narcissistic. — Sun Jul 26 2009 19:18 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1002: | Actually, beautiful people usually finish LAST, because beauty is fleeting and discourages the development of other skills. — Sun Jul 26 2009 20:25 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1003: | What most people take for "thirst" is really an addict's craving for caffeine. Bodily fluid levels are fine. — Sun Jul 26 2009 20:43 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1004: | Did you know that Wilkes Barre-Scranton has an INTERNATIONAL airport? I'm wondering what foreign cities are served from there. — Sun Jul 26 2009 22:46 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1005: | The most dangerous people are those with absolute moral certainty about what should be done. — Mon Jul 27 2009 00:56 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1006: | My definition for "holographic": something that exists for itself, on its own terms, without need for others. Compare to "holographic will". — Mon Jul 27 2009 06:56 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1007: | "holographic relationship" - a relationship that exists solely for itself, without any expectation of outside acknowledgment or reward. — Mon Jul 27 2009 07:00 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1008: | Most people make poor photographers because they can't separate their own emotions from what actually appears in the eye. — Mon Jul 27 2009 15:16 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1009: | Half the battle of life is learning to see what's actually there in front of you versus what you want to be there. - #existentialism — Mon Jul 27 2009 15:26 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1010: | Dead skunk is the official state odor of Pennsylvania. — Mon Jul 27 2009 23:03 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1011: | Charity must never seem like charity. For the gift to be effective, the recipient must work for it. — Mon Jul 27 2009 23:15 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1012: | It is unfair to blame the opposite gender for your own failures in love. Gays fail just as badly and in exactly the same ways. — Mon Jul 27 2009 23:44 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1013: | Words won't change an emotionally-driven behavior. Only boundaries can. http://bit.ly/hRjxO (Kilroy Cafe #22) Addiction, dom. violence, etc. — Tue Jul 28 2009 00:17 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1014: | We construct our own romantic disasters. The opposite gender just fulfills them for us. — Tue Jul 28 2009 00:22 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1015: | Juvenile justice is America's only serious attempt at rehabilitative justice - i.e. intended to actually reduce future crime. — Tue Jul 28 2009 00:44 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1016: | My new photos from Calgary, Alberta: http://bit.ly/Qi2Z8 — Tue Jul 28 2009 02:06 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1017: | The risk in giving advice is that if someone follows it and gets in trouble, you are responsible. Call it the "Advice Dilemma". — Tue Jul 28 2009 02:45 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1018: | The Advice Dilemma prevents the release of useful information to people who need it. The advice must be foolproof or the advisor is liable. — Tue Jul 28 2009 02:47 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1019: | The Advice Dilemma means that advice must coded and the recipient tested. "I can't tell you what to do but here's a hint." — Tue Jul 28 2009 02:50 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1020: | In love, as in cell phone contracts, pay-as-you-go is usually preferable to long commitments. — Tue Jul 28 2009 12:28 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1021: | The cost of security is loss of freedom -- and even then you rarely get the security you expected. — Tue Jul 28 2009 12:46 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1022: | The problem with long commitments is the world may change in ways you weren't expecting, then you're trapped in the old path. — Tue Jul 28 2009 13:26 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1023: | Work sucks and school discourages independent learning, but most people need these structures to avoid even worse chaos. — Tue Jul 28 2009 16:45 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1024: | It can be a great ego boost to know you chose the right religion and that God loves you the best. Lucky you! — Tue Jul 28 2009 19:30 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1025: | Breaking News from The Onion: China Strong! http://bit.ly/2KA1NS - Americans Love Fish By-Product! http://bit.ly/V5jZ4 - LMAO! — Wed Jul 29 2009 01:17 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1026: | There's something ever-so-slightly wrong with this Chinese company website. Can you find it? http://yuwanmei.com/ — Wed Jul 29 2009 01:37 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1027: | Dreams, once fulfilled, often become prisons. — Wed Jul 29 2009 02:38 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1028: | Passing through Hannibal, Missouri, I ponder how the good Dr. Lector has forever changed the meaning of this name. — Wed Jul 29 2009 02:45 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1029: | The lower half of the Mississippi River has been misnamed! It should be called the Missouri because that's the bigger river when they join. — Wed Jul 29 2009 03:09 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1030: | Travelers' essentials along any highway in America: gas stations, restaurants, motels, adult superstores, "Nude Girls - XXX". — Wed Jul 29 2009 12:09 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1031: | Seen along a highway in Texas: "Make a Difference... Be A Corrections Officer". Photo: http://bit.ly/4g9yys - Never thought of it that way. — Wed Jul 29 2009 22:58 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1032: | People usually choose their life based on how it looks in the brochure, not on how they actually experience it. - #existentialism — Thu Jul 30 2009 00:03 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1033: | When you get used to jetlag, you can easily wake and sleep anytime, but If you fail to get enough sleep, your mental processes deteriorate. — Thu Jul 30 2009 09:14 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1034: | Many cities have "airports", but only Portland, Maine, has a "jetport". That's because they're hip, with-it and totally groovy, man! — Thu Jul 30 2009 09:26 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1035: | I walk about 3 mph on the flat. Handy to know when planning public transit. Should I bus it - or walk it? — Thu Jul 30 2009 09:49 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1036: | The next Civil War will pit the Waffle House states against the Dunkin' Donuts states. — Thu Jul 30 2009 10:01 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1037: | "He brought his BITCH to the Waffle Hut!" -- The Ladykillers — Thu Jul 30 2009 10:08 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1038: | There's not much money is supplying people's needs. Supplying their addictions is where you make the big bucks! — Thu Jul 30 2009 10:56 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1039: | Pan Am has been reincarnated as "Pan Am World Railways", a clunky railroad in the Northeast. Saw the name and logo on a boxcar and went HUH? — Fri Jul 31 2009 00:29 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1040: | "I asked myself, 'Where would people never notice a town full of robots?'... Connecticut!" -- The Stepford Wives — Fri Jul 31 2009 12:57 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1041: | The proper local pronunciation of "New Orleans" is "Nawlins". — Fri Jul 31 2009 15:53 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1042: | Some kind of POST-APOCALYPTIC NIGHTMARE!? How else to explain why everyone's trying to ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK the same Friday afternoon I am? — Fri Jul 31 2009 18:57 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1043: | Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but the word almost always refers to some form of graceful simplicity. — Fri Jul 31 2009 20:28 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1044: | Beauty isn't something muddied and confusing but clear and direct. — Fri Jul 31 2009 20:29 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1045: | Rights are what protects you from the inevitable incompetence of government. - #law — Sat Aug 01 2009 00:49 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1046: | Hate to admit it, but Wal-Mart is my touchstone. As I wander rootlessly, I stop here 2-3 times a day. Don't even buy much. Just reassurance. — Sat Aug 01 2009 08:45 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1047: | In Oregon and New Jersey, you can't pump your own gas. Attendants have to do it. It's the (stupid) law! AKA "socialism". — Sat Aug 01 2009 10:55 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1048: | Just say "No" to tattoos! They (a) deteriorate with time and (b) commit you to a message you might not always agree with. — Sat Aug 01 2009 12:57 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1049: | Which was more significant: the Wright Brothers' first flight in 1903 or Zefram Cochran's invention of the warp drive in 2063? Explain. — Sat Aug 01 2009 13:19 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1050: | Most people were never meant to be self-employed. Without a structure provided by others, they self-destruct. — Sat Aug 01 2009 15:46 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1051: | The simple insanity of New York: Can't leave LaGuardia cuz I don't have EXACT CHANGE for the bus (dollar bills not accepted). I H8 NY! — Sat Aug 01 2009 23:54 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1052: | I'm now a card-carrying New Yorker, with a shiny new MetroCard subway card. Got $8 invested in this town! High hopes, low expectations. — Sun Aug 02 2009 00:05 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1053: | Got to admit New Yorkers are a proud people. They don't even know they're living in depravity and squalor. — Sun Aug 02 2009 01:18 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1054: | Anyone notice how COMPLETELY POINTLESS Times Square is? People come to gawk at advertising, so they just keep putting more up! — Sun Aug 02 2009 01:47 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1055: | If your comfort food was JUST NOT EATING, you could probably lose a lot of weight! — Sun Aug 02 2009 01:55 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1056: | If traveling in or out of New York City, check out the incredible bus deals at http://megabus.com - $18 to Boston, etc. THIS IS NOT SPAM™! — Sun Aug 02 2009 03:31 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1057: | This homeless community has rules to live by. NY Times: "Living in Tents, and by the Rules, Under a Bridge" http://bit.ly/wmiGv (7/30) — Mon Aug 03 2009 19:39 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1058: | "Old" is the state of being so trapped in your past emotional investments that you can no longer significantly change. — Tue Aug 04 2009 01:13 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1059: | The right of privacy does not extend after death. — Tue Aug 04 2009 01:19 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1060: | You may be able to control your public image while alive, but when you die the mask will fall and you'll be seen for who you really were. — Tue Aug 04 2009 01:53 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1061: | If you drive at night, you often have to take it on faith that there's a road in front of you. — Tue Aug 04 2009 02:03 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1062: | I know this is an old grudge, but wasn't it Ralph Nader who gave us George Bush? — Tue Aug 04 2009 10:08 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1063: | Just because you're rich in money doesn't mean you're rich in time, and it's the time that will run out first. — Tue Aug 04 2009 13:33 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1064: | "Taste Inflation: Why We Can Never Have Enough" http://bit.ly/Dlxek (Kilroy Cafe #36, April 09) — Tue Aug 04 2009 14:04 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1065: | My new blog entry: "The Prison of Home Ownership" http://bit.ly/957DZ (Homeless by Choice) — Tue Aug 04 2009 14:07 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1066: | The American Dream is supposedly home ownership, but people don't realize when they enter the dream how quickly it can turn to a nightmare. — Tue Aug 04 2009 18:48 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1067: | The key asset in life, you may discover too late, is not money but freedom. - #existentialism — Tue Aug 04 2009 19:01 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1068: | What space do you really need to live in? The optimum of economy is an 8 by 8-foot box, like an officer's cabin in a Navy ship. — Tue Aug 04 2009 19:04 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1069: | The hell of home ownership is not just the burden of paying for it, but all the crap that collects in that extra space. — Tue Aug 04 2009 19:07 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1070: | This is all one really needs in life: an 8x8-foot box. PHOTO: http://bit.ly/VVajT (I could do without the roommate, though.) — Tue Aug 04 2009 19:38 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1071: | I have now arranged my past tweets in a convenient paged archive: http://kilroycafe.com/twitter/ — Wed Aug 05 2009 02:06 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1072: | "If I Only Had a Brain" - the lyrics: http://bit.ly/16sk6h (from "The Wizard of Oz") "I could while away the hours..." — Wed Aug 05 2009 09:36 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1073: | When I heard Bill Clinton helped free two journalists from N. Korea, I thought, "He must have had some contact with the State Dept."... Duh! — Wed Aug 05 2009 11:03 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1074: | Images from "The Wizard of Oz": http://bit.ly/1GIbZs - We're off to see the Wizard!... — Wed Aug 05 2009 11:07 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1075: | Breaking news from The Onion: "Sanyo Praying Area Man Doesn't Send In Rebate Form" http://bit.ly/1CvcVR — Wed Aug 05 2009 14:37 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1076: | All German tourists feel they must visit Death Valley -- in the summer! Some of them die, but Germany keeps making more. — Wed Aug 05 2009 20:01 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1077: | Ever gone into a public toilet stall to find many layers of toilet paper laid on the seat? That's the work of an obsessive-compulsive. — Thu Aug 06 2009 12:48 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1078: | Law is written by image-conscious legislators elected by dim-witted voters to address the public hysteria of the moment. — Thu Aug 06 2009 12:50 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1079: | My new photos from Bear Flats, an abandoned roadhouse along the Alaska Highway in the Yukon: http://bit.ly/1DU0Pq — Fri Aug 07 2009 03:33 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1080: | If you flash at fireflies with a penlight, you can sometimes get them to flash back (and totally screw up their love life). — Fri Aug 07 2009 03:36 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1081: | War is good for the economy! Without so many personnel in Iraq and Afghanistan, unemployment would be far worse. Thank you, George Bush! — Fri Aug 07 2009 03:39 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1082: | People can become so used to Misery that they invite it back into their home as soon as it leaves. — Fri Aug 07 2009 12:43 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1083: | Once you escape from one prison, the greatest danger is that you rapidly seek out another. — Fri Aug 07 2009 12:44 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1084: | My new photos from "Freedom Tour 2009" http://bit.ly/16Ej8W - Inspiring America in a right wing Love Bus. — Fri Aug 07 2009 12:53 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1085: | The only thing as terrifying as Republicans controlling government is Democrats controlling it. Most "bold initiatives" lead to deep shit. — Fri Aug 07 2009 21:28 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1086: | In the dollar store business, there's a fine line between a Dollar Tree and idolatry. — Sat Aug 08 2009 02:14 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1087: | The "health care crisis" is ultimately unsolvable because when someone is dying there is no limit to the amount that can be spent on them. — Sat Aug 08 2009 02:18 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1088: | Campbell's Law of Storage: Ones possessions will expand to fill whatever storage space is available. New blog entry: http://bit.ly/N5S3C — Sat Aug 08 2009 03:11 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1089: | Intelligence or stupidity is almost always a matter of controlling or not controlling your emotions. — Sat Aug 08 2009 12:12 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1090: | Intelligence is not a talent but a choice. — Sat Aug 08 2009 12:15 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1091: | Petrified Forest National Park: the most boring in the nation. You go there to see... PETRIFIED WOOD. — Sat Aug 08 2009 18:09 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1092: | Governments make incompetent parents because they are unable to compromise. They would kill a child with protection. — Sat Aug 08 2009 20:07 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1093: | Often, the most dangerous gift you can give someone is good fortune. It can disrupt their equilibrium and set the stage for disaster. — Sat Aug 08 2009 20:58 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1094: | Once people's basic needs have been met, they start inventing new needs, which don't usually do anything for them except killing time. — Sat Aug 08 2009 22:38 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1095: | When you learn about some people's frivolous hobbies, you want to scream at them: "IS THIS ALL YOU WANT TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE?!" - #existentialism — Sat Aug 08 2009 23:04 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1096: | It's another old grudge, but were Hiroshima and Nagasaki really necessary? Talk about a Holocaust! — Sun Aug 09 2009 12:04 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1097: | One of the cruelest forms of child abuse is making someone a child star. It virtually guarantees drug abuse and a screwed up self-image. — Sun Aug 09 2009 13:20 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1098: | Freedom is never given. It is strategically won. — Sun Aug 09 2009 13:34 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1099: | I've just released a new Thing You Don't Need: HAND SANITIZERS: http://bit.ly/TYlqQ - You don't want a flabby immune system do you? — Sun Aug 09 2009 14:38 GMT — view/retweet
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| #1100: | There are no miracles in life, only trade-offs. - #existentialism — Sun Aug 09 2009 14:47 GMT — view/retweet
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