#2601: | The main social tool of children is emotional manipulation. They cry and we come. |
#2602: | The irony of law enforcement is that it needs crime to justify its existence. It will scare the public to protect its budget. |
#2603: | My photo of the new "Berlin Wall" in Jerusalem: http://bit.ly/bLsA1g - (Oct. 09) Also see my other Israel albums: http://bit.ly/bXZ0qH |
#2604: | A skunk smells sweet to a skunk! |
#2605: | Kilroy Cafe #67: "Curiosity: The Hallmark of Intellect" http://bit.ly/dvMVUo - If children are curious, why can't adults be? |
#2606: | As an (ex) airline employee, I can fly First Class for only $20, but I don't because it isn't worth $20. Only dipshits fly First Class! |
#2607: | wine—n. the world's oldest consumer fraud. Fermented fruit juice sold to gullible social climbers based on invented distinctions of taste. |
#2608: | New blog entry: "Airport Camping in Ontario, California" http://bit.ly/c1PFMT - Missed a flight but didn't miss any sleep. |
#2609: | There ain't nuthin' country music can't do when it pulls together to change the world. ("Ain't nothin' it can't do" = It can't do anything.) |
#2610: | The ultimate test of free will is being trapped in prison and seeing it as an opportunity. |
#2611: | Those who drink to escape their problems will always find problems to drink to. |
#2612: | It's hard-working people from the heartland who make this country great and give us http://PeopleOfWalmart.com |
#2613: | A new place is most exciting before you go and when you first arrive. Within a day or two, it will seem as common as where you came from. |
#2614: | The art of photography (and the art of life) lies in seeing what is actually there in front of you, not what you want to be there. |
#2615: | The desperate problem of the rich is finding ways to spend their money. Fortunately, plenty of marketers will help them invent new needs. |
#2616: | "Chance favors the prepared mind." —Louis Pasteur |
#2617: | Research shows that most divorces are caused by marriage. http://bit.ly/cjgsQp (repost of Kilroy Cafe #2: Ban Gay Marriage!) |
#2618: | On my bucket list: Spend 10 years in prison for a crime I did commit but thought I wouldn't get caught for. |
#2619: | See the SkyMall™ catalog in the seatback in front of you for some of the world's most burdensome and unnecessary products. |
#2620: | There's a huge difference between offering a service that makes sense to both parties and offering it only because you need the money. |
#2621: | The greatest luxury of business is being able to tell a potential customer, willing to pay you, that your services don't make sense for him. |
#2622: | Life is full of "Duh!" moments when you realize you've been doing things the hard way. It was so simple, if only you could have seen. |
#2623: | New photo album: "Celebrity Impersonators Convention in Las Vegas": http://bit.ly/dhA0sl - Whooping it up with Sarah Palin and 3 Presidents! |
#2624: | The key to a great performance, in any field, is seeing yourself as the audience sees you, not as you want to be seen. |
#2625: | Statistics about what other people are doing have no relevance to what you should do. |
#2626: | Schadenfreude may be justified when someone who actively courts fame or wild animals gets bitten by same. It cuts both ways, buddy! |
#2627: | Reporting from Las Vegas: Guess what? Celebrity impersonators are every bit as "diva" as the stars they are duplicating! |
#2628: | Kilroy Cafe #68: "The Secret of Great Performances" http://bit.ly/aYcoJC - Inspired by a celebrity impersonators convention in Las Vegas! |
#2629: | For neverending drama on television, try The Weather Channel. Their motto should be: "It's always something!" |
#2630: | The competence of a professional will never exceed the instructions of the person who hires him. |
#2631: | There's a limit to how much quality money can buy. You may get an adequate copy of whatever you ask for, but you can't buy inspiration. |
#2632: | Check out the amazing time-saving technology called "words"! Distills complex events into short descriptions of what's different about them. |
#2633: | Photo: This morning on a flight to Seattle: http://bit.ly/cauOmE - Awww! |
#2634: | None of us deserve the indignity of being trapped on this primitive planet, but we might as well make the best of it. |
#2635: | mind pollution — n. unnecessary sensory input from the environment (TV, music, talking, etc.) that interferes with your own thoughts. |
#2636: | Lessons of the Las Vegas impersonators convention: The best impersonators don't just reproduce a celebrity; they add something new! |
#2637: | New photo album: Mingling with celebrity impersonators at their convention in Las Vegas: http://bit.ly/aQrV30 |
#2638: | Narcissism is when you do something ordinary but think it's extraordinary, just because you did it. |
#2639: | Narcissism is when you expect praise and special attention from others, regardless of their needs or whether you did anything to meet them. |
#2640: | Narcissist. (See "entertainer".) |
#2641: | A narcissist is not necessarily a sociopath. He may care about others; he just doesn't know how. |
#2642: | My old arch-nemesis at Area 51, "America's Prophet" Sean David Morton, has been charged with securities fraud. http://bit.ly/bre1pe |
#2643: | Quality is a lonely business because the world doesn't want it. The world prefers reliable mediocrity delivered on demand. |
#2644: | The prefix "Nutra" at the beginning of a product name is intended to imply nutrition without actually supplying any. |
#2645: | One advantage of being an Oprah impersonator is that you don't have to worry about your waistline. Fat, thin, it all works! |
#2646: | Photo: A fine Charles Bronson! http://bit.ly/bvywXE (Better than the real thing!) |
#2647: | Photo: Three of the world's toughest action figures: http://bit.ly/bGpvvv (or reasonable facsimiles thereof) |
#2648: | The Celebrity Impersonator Convention I just attended will be on CBS Sunday Morning this Sunday (March 7, 9am+) http://bit.ly/cqQCfz |
#2649: | Dog shows, talent contests, beauty pageants — there's nothing unbiased about them! The winner is chosen by the politics of the moment. |
#2650: | After all we've done to this planet — pollution, deforestation, overpopulation — maybe it's time to start thinking green. Soylent Green. |
#2651: | Photo: One of these Jack Sparrows is not like the others. Can you tell which one? http://bit.ly/96dPuE |
#2652: | Beware of any edible item with "y" at the end: chocolaty, buttery, cheesy. It is a product of chemical engineering and not actual food. |
#2653: | A true impersonator is called against his will. People keep saying "You look like him!" until you finally give in. |
#2654: | Pain is real, but pleasure is in the eye of the beholder. Only one thing is undeniably pleasurable: relief from pain. |
#2655: | If your life is simple, you can master it and make few mistakes. If your life is complex, you'll always be stumbling. |
#2656: | I don't believe in God but act like I do. It's the best of both worlds! |
#2657: | Call me impulsive, a risk taker, a wild man. I just clicked "Agree" for the Terms and Conditions without actually reading them. |
#2658: | Language Police: They aren't "Gypsies" anymore. They're "Roman Peoples". |
#2659: | Reporting from Seattle: For every right-wing nutcase (Archie Bunker), there's a left-wing nutcase (Maude). The latter predominate here. |
#2660: | Left-wing nutcases hold noisy and useless rallies against non-specific foes like "violence". |
#2661: | The most powerful force in the universe is described in one word: Mother. |
#2662: | My career as a photographer may be short, but I have photographed many presidents and celebrities: http://bit.ly/aQrV30 |
#2663: | Once people get used to prison, you can take away the bars and they'll still stay in their cell. |
#2664: | It is impossible to deal with masses of people and truly feel for them. You can only follow procedure. |
#2665: | Celebrity is our society's celebration of those who perform but don't create or do. |
#2666: | Airport announcements are the endless repetition of meaningless advice that is irrelevant to you in this part of the airport. |
#2667: | Twentysomethings are merely a higher class of teenager. For the most part there's no reasoning with them. |
#2668: | The worst mistakes of life are misguided attempts to take a temporary thrill and make it permanent. |
#2669: | "Justice will be served. But by then you'll already be full." @TheBosha |
#2670: | Changing planes in Chatroulette, North Carolina. (Man, this thing is big!) |
#2671: | One advantage of living in a society of relative wealth is that you don't have to be wealthy to be comfortable. |
#2672: | Facebook images expanded from 604 pixels to 720 pixels! http://bit.ly/bwdHgO |
#2673: | Most of the attraction of the beach is in going there. Once you actually arrive, there is rarely anything to do. |
#2674: | Money in excess of ones needs is more an enabler of dysfunction than a key to happiness. |
#2675: | True wealth is measured in two ways: freedom from financial stress and freedom to do what you wish with your time. Income is irrelevant. |
#2676: | When you dedicate your life to a single medium (music, photography, writing, etc), you end up with fine technical skills and nothing to say. |
#2677: | The American Dream, as defined by practice, is buying a property you can't afford and spending the rest of your life enslaved to it. |
#2678: | On my bucket list: Custom-build an expensive vacation home in a prime scenic area then never go there. |
#2679: | I've lost my 3-D glasses from Avatar, so I might as well delete the whole movie from my brain. It will free up a lot of dead storage space. |
#2680: | The world, with all its billions, may seem huge, but if you count those who are doing what you are and doing it well, it's tiny indeed! |
#2681: | Photo: A hamster-eye view of a very large creature: http://bit.ly/cOdj7B |
#2682: | A luxury car, like a beauty queen, does not age gracefully. After the first few thousand miles, she's a high-maintenance bitch. |
#2683: | People carry their baggage with them wherever they go, turning each new situation into what they expect it to be. |
#2684: | Economic activity — buying, selling and scams related thereto — come as naturally to the human as breathing, eating and sex. |
#2685: | Pruning is the tightening of a network by eliminating unused pathways. Applies to nerve cells, relationships, possessions and obligations. |
#2686: | Pets are a deceptively charming mechanism to imprison you and absorb any excess resources you may have. |
#2687: | "Authorities are investigating" — just another convenient way to say, "You can turn away now," even though the story isn't over. |
#2688: | In a single instant, after one small miscalculation, everything in your life can change. |
#2689: | If no one is listening, you can keep talking, but it's only for your own benefit. |
#2690: | "When we change our minds, we change the state of matter itself." via @conformer - Not literally, but everything short of matter can change. |
#2691: | The mind, by necessity, imposes constraints on the infinite possibilities of the world. Change your mind, and new options open up. |
#2692: | Religion isn't just a belief in God but in certain social policies, taken on faith, that limit the ways you can solve your problems. |
#2693: | The great irony of offering advice is that the people most in need of it are those least capable of accepting it. |
#2694: | "I love carrots." @RhodiHawk - But carrots are so secretive and deceptive. You can't understand them 'til you pull em up by the roots. |
#2695: | Photo: Spring Break, Destin, Florida. These poor guys are hopelessly outnumbered! http://bit.ly/aLHI9I - A humanitarian crisis? |
#2696: | New Photo Album: Pike Place Market, Seattle. http://bit.ly/dAifmH |
#2697: | New Photo Album: On-Stage at the Celebrity Impersonators Convention, Las Vegas: http://bit.ly/dhA0sl |
#2698: | The goal of marketing to the wealthy is to invent new ways for them to prove they have good taste. |
#2699: | The concept of rescue is usually misguided. You can give people the tools for their own rescue, but they have to do it themselves. |
#2700: | The risk in rescuing someone is they come to expect it and get themselves in the same mess again. |