#3501: | You need: food, medical care, a safe place to sleep, community with others and a meaningful mission. Almost every other "need" is imaginary. |
#3502: | Photo: A vegetarian protest outside a McDonalds in downtown Boston. (a week ago) http://bit.ly/axh90J |
#3503: | WARNING: The State of California may contain objects known by the State of California to cause extreme apathy — excessive warning signs! |
#3504: | People are bounded by fences of their own creation and are loath to cross them except under duress. |
#3505: | There will always be a difference between theory and reality. Plans never turn out quite as expected. The wise can adjust. The unwise can't. |
#3506: | Given there are millions of "germs" on every surface, the real issue is the health of your immune system, not how much Lysol™ you use. |
#3507: | Americans believe the best way to solve a problem is buying a product rather than changing their lifestyle to address it at its root. |
#3508: | The American economy is dependent on selling people things they don't need, because there is little profit in selling things they do need. |
#3509: | The job of advertising is to stimulate artificial demand. |
#3510: | That's quite a resume you have there! You spent your life selling people things they don't need. @DarthVader would be proud! |
#3511: | It is human nature to stockpile resources (food, tools, etc) for future lean times, but in an environment of plenty it becomes pathological. |
#3512: | RVs are for people who enjoy the free-wheeling, happy-go-lucky, devil-may-care lifestyle as long as they can take all their stuff with them. |
#3513: | They're called "convenience stores" because they're very convenient. They put height markings by the door so you know how tall you are. |
#3514: | Isn't it pointless to charge someone with capital murder but put him on suicide watch if he tries to kill himself? |
#3515: | It is impossible to tell good fortune from bad until time has passed. |
#3516: | The implicit message of marriage is, "I don't trust you." If your love was so secure, why would it need this public declaration? |
#3517: | This is all you need to know about centigrade: 0 is freezing; 40 is Hell on Earth, and 25 is Heaven. |
#3518: | The only trouble with love and understanding is it can't stand up to thugs and despots, who feel no compulsion to return the favor. |
#3519: | "Thank you for flying Anhedonian Air. Have a wonderless day." @rejecter - Hey, Annie Donia is a friend of mine! |
#3520: | "Life's Tragedy is that we get old to soon and wise too late." - Benjamin Franklin via @tweetsayings |
#3521: | RT: @WSJ This was our most-tweeted story over the weekend: How Power Affects Us http://on.wsj.com/9aSOSK |
#3522: | "I deny the need for meaning because I'm terrified there isn't any." @rejecter - Of course there isn't any. You have to invent it. |
#3523: | Photo: In Sarajevo, sampling local Bosnian cuisine http://bit.ly/9StCyY (three weeks ago) |
#3524: | To destroy someone you don't need guns or knives. Just give him instant fame or a large sum of money and watch him destroy himself. |
#3525: | The good news: Nature doesn't waste souls. You'll be back in a new body after this one. Bad news: You can't take your experience with you. |
#3526: | The only ways to achieve immortality are to be extremely evil (like Hitler) or to share your wisdom so people keep coming back to it. |
#3527: | The common feature of a know-it-all is how little he knows. He has to flaunt and parade his knowledge because he doesn't have much of it. |
#3528: | Knowledge should not be confused with wisdom, which is an awareness of where your knowledge ends. |
#3529: | The true test of human character is how a person behaves when he has power over others and no accountability. |
#3530: | There is no humiliating task that people aren't willing to do, day after day, year after year, for the illusion of job security. |
#3531: | If you set your standards too high, the thing that the standards apply to will never get done. |
#3532: | Some of the most crippled ones are those who grew up in affluent suburbia, only to discover the world doesn't work that way. |
#3533: | It is a miracle of modern marketing how the Coca-Cola company can take ordinary tap water and turn it into Dasani™. |
#3534: | The forests of Europe are free of poison ivy and Lyme disease but have a persistent werewolf, vampire and Big Bad Wolf problem. |
#3535: | I don't know which is worse, porn or Norman Rockwell. Seriously, people believed that perfect white America shit! |
#3536: | RT @HuffingtonPort SCARY look At How Unemployment Has Swept Across America http://huff.to/av3HM3 - Good news: Nebraska still looks fine! |
#3537: | Our Brave New World is supported by a legion of idiots — people falling for the absurd scams advertised on the margins of web pages. |
#3538: | Google's motto is "Don't be evil," but it has become the world's largest purveyor of porn and consumer ad scams. Should be "See no evil." |
#3539: | Twitter Inc has created the perfect platform for NOT making any money. This can't last forever. How long before Google buys it? |
#3540: | A 1992 news report on the siege of Sarajevo. Video: http://youtu.be/3PJjAczCf3k - My 2010 photos: http://bit.ly/bI0ONC |
#3541: | Kilroy's Rules of Twitter Style: http://bit.ly/bRtf6g - The rules I (usually) follow myself. |
#3542: | Consciousness is not infinite. Every thought takes time, and perception registers only a few features of your environment at one time. |
#3543: | The value of photography is that it records more of the environment than you notice at the time. |
#3544: | Children have crazy ideas but grow out of them. Adults are less likely to because they invest in those ideas and can't accept the loss. |
#3545: | The Afghan and Iraq wars were cleverly designed to support our VA hospital system and keep it supplied with patients for the next 50 years. |
#3546: | Video: Explaining the Fall of Rome (from outside the Roman Forum) http://youtu.be/aR7vE5YEvms - It just got too damn big! |
#3547: | SPOILER ALERT: It was all just a dream after all. |
#3548: | The most effective form of censorship is when you talk directly at someone but they just don't hear. |
#3549: | Being famous doesn't make you rich. You get rich by using your fame to hawk some rip-off product. |
#3550: | The first defense of the narcissist is to accuse others of selfishness. |
#3551: | An actor is with you when he's with you but not when he's not. |
#3552: | An actor is a professional faker — and probably a personal one too. Don't expect much fidelity from someone who's job is to be someone else. |
#3553: | Don't fagetta payah fayah when ridin' the "T" to Hahvahd Squayah. http://myloc.me/aNFhI |
#3554: | "Sometimes I'm not sure if I love you or if I've been here so long the Stockholm Syndrome is kicking in." @Paxochka - Aren't they the same? |
#3555: | "They were originally going to put a Christian place of worship at Ground Zero, but WAL-MART backed out at the last minute." @Remiel |
#3556: | Not sure what it's good for, but I've signed up for LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/kilroycafe |
#3557: | Photo: @TheBosha interviewed in an undisclosed location. Acknowledges tunnels could contain alien life. http://bit.ly/aeBb10 (Aug. 8) |
#3558: | The only thing certain about life is uncertainty. Your best laid plans wil never turn out quite as expected. |
#3559: | No matter how carefully you plan ahead, there are bound to be unexpected events that undermine the underlying assumptions of those plans. |
#3560: | If you don't know what to do with your life, then your mission is to explore. You want to collect experiences but not commitments. |
#3561: | Dear @DeathStarPR: Have you considered rebranding? Your Life Star™ emits a Hope Ray™ to clear a path for new growth. |
#3562: | Addiction and fatalism go hand in hand. You don't have one without the other. |
#3563: | In life, as in Las Vegas, only the winners get publicity. The losers follow them, make unwise gambles and continue to fail. |
#3564: | Age of Chivalry Renaissance Faire, Las Vegas, Oct. 8-10 http://www.lvrenfair.com/ - I'll be attending (as a mere peasant). A total hoot! |
#3565: | American industry is run by retards, people who already have enough money but who have nothing better to do than acquire more of it. |
#3566: | Most of the things other people can do, you can do too. If you think you can't it's probably because you haven't seriously tried. |
#3567: | The greatest asset — and deepest flaw — of humans is their willingness to follow others and accept the assumptions they are given. |
#3568: | New photos from Sedona, Arizona: http://bit.ly/bTc541 (yesterday) |
#3569: | Power turns little people into assholes. Those with the lowest self-esteem become the biggest jerks as soon as they gain power over others. |
#3570: | People who are least deserving of their good fortune have the biggest ego. |
#3571: | Brilliant plan! RT @HollywoodKodiak Meanwhile, back in his Malthusian lair, The Sterilizer readied his IQ-targeted infertility ray. |
#3572: | Life, in fact, may be a holographic projection, but since it's the best reality we have, we must live it as though it was real. |
#3573: | You are not responsible for the fate of planets, only for the things you can reasonably change. |
#3574: | "Consumer confidence" should not be confused with happiness, which may improve as people realize, "Hey, we don't need this stuff anyway!" |
#3575: | The key to success on Twitter is being fashionably cynical about your life. No one wants to read about you getting things done. |
#3576: | RT @washingtonpost July plunge in home sales is a necessary economic colonic: http://wapo.st/bAjdCt |
#3577: | The old American Dream of home ownership will be replaced by a new, more American dream: freedom of movement tethered only to the internet. |
#3578: | Time to revive an old term: "frigid" — people who are incapable of giving to others, who suck the joy out of any room they enter. |
#3579: | You can't tell people their own personality flaws. They'll either become defensive and angry or claim they're too old or weak to change. |
#3580: | You can make a pseudo-life by monitoring the news and commenting on it online, but that's not the same as having a real life of your own. |
#3581: | The news is a convenient addiction to distract you from how little is happening in your own life. |
#3582: | The only opinions worth expressing are those that apply to every place and time, that people will still find meaningful years from now. |
#3583: | Wisdom is knowing what you don't know — and being able to function without knowing it. |
#3584: | Instead of making one grand decision based on faith, you should make many small decisions based on knowledge. |
#3585: | Avoid making decisions until you have to act on them. A delayed decision is usually a better informed one. |
#3586: | After WWII, there were still some old Nazis who believed in the cause. The only thing to do with these people is let time kill them off. |
#3587: | Germans tend to shop wisely and save more money than they spend. It's this kind of anti-American attitude that's hobbling the world economy! |
#3588: | Seminole, Oklahoma: home of the finest beef jerky in all the land. Photo: http://j.mp/aiEoao - Related: My jaw hurts! |
#3589: | FYI: Due to the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, once you know I'm someplace, I'm not there anymore. Wikipedia: http://j.mp/cydM9B |
#3590: | The art of management should not be confused with the art of selling management seminars. |
#3591: | He who attends management seminars doesn't get it and probably never will. |
#3592: | The only difference between luxury marketing and con artistry is legality. If done right, the mark doesn't even know he's been taken. |
#3593: | Bathing in the Arkansas River near Van Buren. Photo: http://j.mp/bEsUFT - The soap employed: http://j.mp/9e4vqe |
#3594: | One little shark attack ruins the beach for everyone, but one deadly car accident doesn't ruin the highway. Why? |
#3595: | When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, but when it gives you something better, by all means change beverages! |
#3596: | Marriage is a religious institution, performed by priests of whatever faith you believe in. Why should government be involved at all? |
#3597: | The thing none of us is prepared for is how love can turn into a prison. |
#3598: | Perjury is a crime reserved mainly for the rich and famous when their lies reach the tabloids. |
#3599: | All dreams, even when they come true, eventually turn into work. |
#3600: | On my bucket list: Join a Christian mega-church so my spiritual needs can be fulfilled with the greatest efficiency possible. |